I looked out, and saw nothing unusual. “What’s up, guys?”
Tuppence shushed me. “We’re keeping watch for The Very Vicious.”
Tuppence shushed me. “We’re keeping watch for The Very Vicious.”
“The Very Vicious what?”
“What what?”
“You said ‘The Very Vicious’, and didn’t say what.”
“What what?”
“You said ‘The Very Vicious’, and didn’t say what.”
Now Tommy shushed me, and mumbled, “What’s all this what?”
I said, “Very and vicious are modifiers. They need a verb or a noun to modify. So, ‘very vicious’ what?”
I said, “Very and vicious are modifiers. They need a verb or a noun to modify. So, ‘very vicious’ what?”
Tuppence whirled on me.
“We’re watching for a monster, and you want to talk grammar. That’s what’s wrong with you.”
“OK, what monster?”
Tommy looked over his shoulder, “The Very Vicious. We told you.”
“OK, what monster?”
Tommy looked over his shoulder, “The Very Vicious. We told you.”
It seemed easier to go along. “OK, who or what is The Very Vicious.”
Tuppy supplied, “Our Nemesis.”
“Nemesis?” I pondered. “Only super heroes have a Nemesis.”
“And,” smirked Tommy, “The Very Vicious is ours.”
Tuppy supplied, “Our Nemesis.”
“Nemesis?” I pondered. “Only super heroes have a Nemesis.”
“And,” smirked Tommy, “The Very Vicious is ours.”
Stifling a laugh, “Super heroes? Just what are your super powers?”
Tuppence came and sat at my feet. “You would know this if you ever paid attention. We have the power to hear things far beyond the frequency and distance of human hearing; we have the power of smell 100,000 times better than a human sense; and we have the power to eat anything we find at the side of the road with no problem.”
That took a minute to, pardon the pun, digest, and Tuppence turned back to the window while I considered it. Then I asked, “So, good ears, a strong nose, and a cast-iron stomach are your super powers?”
Tuppence came and sat at my feet. “You would know this if you ever paid attention. We have the power to hear things far beyond the frequency and distance of human hearing; we have the power of smell 100,000 times better than a human sense; and we have the power to eat anything we find at the side of the road with no problem.”
That took a minute to, pardon the pun, digest, and Tuppence turned back to the window while I considered it. Then I asked, “So, good ears, a strong nose, and a cast-iron stomach are your super powers?”
“I’ve seen whole TV series built on less,” snorted Tommy.
I couldn’t help myself, “I’m amazed that you didn’t include
Farting Like A Rhino as one of your super powers.”
Like she was speaking to a blond poodle, Tuppence explained, “That, obviously, is the safety relief valve for our Super Stomach.”
Like she was speaking to a blond poodle, Tuppence explained, “That, obviously, is the safety relief valve for our Super Stomach.”
“Oh, of course.”
Hoping for some semblance of reality, I said, “I’ve never heard of your
Very Vicious. Can you describe him?”
Again, Tuppence took charge of the lecture. “He’s not OUR Very Vicious, he is THE Very Vicious. The absolute embodiment of every threat we face in this house.”
“I’ve never seen him,” I said.
“Oh, yes you have. The Very Vicious can put on any shape he wants. He can be a Meter Reader, a UPS Man, a dog walker, a cat, even a squirrel. Basically, anything that passes this house can be, and probably is, The Very Vicious. That’s why we have to be so careful, and bark at anything out there. It could always be The Very Vicious, and who knows what could happen if he ever got in the house.”
Again, Tuppence took charge of the lecture. “He’s not OUR Very Vicious, he is THE Very Vicious. The absolute embodiment of every threat we face in this house.”
“I’ve never seen him,” I said.
“Oh, yes you have. The Very Vicious can put on any shape he wants. He can be a Meter Reader, a UPS Man, a dog walker, a cat, even a squirrel. Basically, anything that passes this house can be, and probably is, The Very Vicious. That’s why we have to be so careful, and bark at anything out there. It could always be The Very Vicious, and who knows what could happen if he ever got in the house.”
“The Very Vicious can even be a squirrel,” I mused. So, I guess that chipmunk out there could be
him.”
The Beagle Posse disgustedly left the room. “Sheesh,” said Tommy. “A chipmunk as The Very Vicious. THAT would be just plain silly.”
No comments:
Post a Comment